My beautiful friend Vanessa sent this to me today and it made me laugh! Having had dogs and cats over the years, I can totally see this!! *hee*

Excerpts from a Dog’s Daily Diary:

8:00 am Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm Milk bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm Wow! Watched TV with my master! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!

Excerpts from a Cat’s Daily Diary:

Day 683 of my captivity: My captors continue to taunt me with
bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat,
while the other inmates are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.
Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I
nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.
The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape.. In an
attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the floor.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their
feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since
it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely
made condescending comments about what a “good little hunter” I am. The
audacity! There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices
tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of
the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I
overheard that my confinement was due to the power of “allergies.”
I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of
my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try
this again tomorrow — but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and
snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly
released –and seems to be more than willing to return. He is
obviously retarded! The bird has got to be an informant. I observe
him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he
reports my every move. The captors have arranged protective custody
for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe……. for now….